It has been quite difficult to wake up this morning.
It was dark, cold and I was quite tired.
It has been difficult to go to work, difficult to take a shower, dress up and get myself together.
It has been difficult to drive today. The roads were slippery and my car wiggled in the icy surfaces.
It has been difficult to dress up Faye, my daughter to go to the daycare.
I had to bundle her in thick layering of sweater, jacket and ski pants. Not too mention the gloves, scarf , toque and boots to top it all up.
|november last year|
It has been extra difficult to snuggle her in her car seat, drive her to daycare and say goodbye.
It is the weather. There is something about the cold, the darkness and the snow that make me want to hold my daughter close to me all day long.
While I was at work, I feel so distant and hollow. I should be with my daughter. We should be both at home while I am make her soup and keep her warm all day long. We should not be apart and cold.
Well... I think that is motherhood right there. We all want to be with them every minute, but we can't. We think we have to be with them every minute but really, it is not necessary.
Motherhood can be an obsession sometimes: Obsession with the need to be with our kids always especially when its dark and cold.
|my daughter with lolo|
Really, the weather is not helping at all.
Then suddenly, it was 3:30 pm. It was time to go home. I picked Faye up from the daycare, wrap her in my arms as she ran towards me .
Then we began to hit the icy road.
The car wiggled again. I was breathless and nervous all the while.
Geez! I miss summer.
|November last year|